Monkey Business

Brought to you by Rhesus Pieces

As a working writer-filmmaker-journo, I’m rooting for these guys:

Last week, the New York Times reported that 43 rhesus macaques had escaped from the Alpha Genesis research facility in Yemassee, South Carolina.

Monkeys?—check. Research facility?—check. Escape plot?—check. Holy shit, this is about to become my favorite Pixar movie. It’s The Secret of NIMH meets The Great Escape—with primates.

I submit that every screenwriter with a Times subscription has their head out the window and is yelling, “Hey, Hollywood, I’ve got your four-quadrant, high-concept summer blockbuster riiight heeere.”

Not one for hot takes, particularly a week after the fact, I must admit the idea of escaped research monkeys has captured my imagination (and is now ransoming it).

Lest I lose a month of precious writing time spec’ing a monkey script because I’m a slave to my muse (I’ve already got a “dog exorcist” script in a virtual drawer — thank you, Trane DeVore), permit me to memorialize (and then hopefully forget…